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Monday, November 14, 2011

No, you're not having candy for dinner, and I'm not buying you a toy.

Man, I am one mean mom - a modern day Mommy Dearest, if you will.  I'm probably single-handedly destroying my son's childhood and scarring him for life with my horrible parenting and lack of empathy.

Or, maybe not.

Lately, Gavin has been vocal about his (ridiculous) desires, and he's not a big fan of "No."

Me:  Gavin, what do you want for dinner?
Gavin: Candy!
Me:  No, you're not having candy for dinner.
Gavin:  I want CANDY!
Me:  You're not having candy.  Pick something else.
Gavin:  I want . . . junk!
Me:  You're not having junk. 

*Cue tears and tantrum.

Or . . .

Gavin:  Mommy, we need to go the grocery store.
Me:  Why?
Gavin:  So you can buy me that boat from Cars 2.
Me:  I thought you were going to ask Santa for that boat.
Gavin: No, I don't want to ask Santa.
Me:  Why not?
Gavin:  Because I want it now!
Me:  Oh, well, you're not getting it now.
Gavin:  But I need that boat.  I don't have it.
Me:  And you're not getting it now.
Gavin:  Come on, Mommy, let's go.
Me:  We're not going to the store.  I'm not buying you a toy.

*Cue tears and tantrum.

You know what else he doesn't like - besides nutritious food and being told "no"?  Calling me "Mommy."

"What are you doing, Andrea?"
"Mommy."
"But I thought your name was Andrea?"
"It is.  But you call me Mommy."
"Okay, Andrea."
"Mommy."
"Your name is Andrea.  My name is Gavin."
"Yep, and you call me Mommy because I'm your mom."
"Where are you going, Andrea?"

Sigh.  And he's not even four yet.

http://lovelinks.freefringes.com/2011/11/15/lovelinks-31-open/
lovelinks

15 comments:

  1. And it only gets worse :) I'm a mean mom, too.

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  2. Grrrrr...lost my original comment.

    Trust me, once Gavin turns 4, things will get easier. He won't be as defiant, and the defiance won't be as funny to him. It's a frustrating phase, but it passes.

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  3. You know - I'm very fond of breaking the news to moms who may not have heard this yet but "3" is the "new terrible twos." I didn't hear about this until we were in the 3's - I had figured since the terrible twos were over I could get some kind of respite, but the 3s were much worse! And then a friend kindly told me this news - anyway - for me it got much better after 4. (-: Good luck.

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  4. I agree with the consensus: it gets better after 4, and you are a mean mommy. I was, too.

    Then you get about 8 good years before they turn 12 and change again.

    Stay mean, Mommy! It's your job! And you're doing it very well. :D

    Trish
    http://contemplatinghappiness.blogspot.com/2011/11/american-holiday.html

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  5. Each stage brings about it's own lovely quirks. When he's four, it'll be something else, then five, then six. Yep. Thankfully, they don't last forever. :)

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  6. When my kids told me I was a mean mom, I said, "Good. That means I'm doing my job." Every age has its good points and its frustrations. Your Gavin sounds like a very bright little boy.

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  7. You ARE the meanest mommy in the world!! Oh, wait. So am I. Gosh. How could we NOT let them have candy and toys all day every day? Huh, Andrea?

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  8. I have been taking care of this wonderful little three-year-old boy who has fallen into the habit of calling his dad by his first name too. He has CP and is extremely smart. I am always amazed at how well he can negotiate. His dad has continued to tell him that his name is Daddy, and I have told him that he is the luckiest boy in the world because no one can call him daddy but him.

    The one thing I see that seems different from when I raised kids...I never asked what they wanted for dinner. I made decisions. It wasn't that I didn't care...it's more that I didn't want their choice to be something that I didn't have in the frig which would have started another war. Opening up that conversation, especially with a child who doesn't understand what a parent's responsibilities and daily braveries are in order to bring that meal to the table was something I was not willing to do. Parenting is a brave and wonderful experiment. We all do the best we can...matter of fact, we do better than we even imagined...and somehow through all the turmoil, it always works out.

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  9. Okay, I'm so sorry, but that last line "Where are you going, Andrea?" made me crack up. I'm trying really really hard not to, because I'm sure it must be frustrating with all the no's and demanding candy and toys and all, but seriously, that was funny. Just kidding, Andrea. I mean, Mommy. Wait, WE can call you Andrea, right? I'm so confused. I think some candy and a boat -a real one, not a toy - would help me straighten things out.

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  10. Hahahaha... That's what I would do if my stepson had ever said that to me... but the "mommy" thing would really piss me off. I just wouldn't respond to him if he called me Erika.

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  11. And this is why we have wine. And yoga. But especially wine.

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  12. LOL - welcome to the wonderful world of toddler, pre-school, early school age, and... I don't know beyond that, my oldest is only in 1st grade. What I can tell you though is that even with my 1st grader we will still have conversations that resemble those above from time to time.

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  13. OH isn't this age such a joy! It is really... what the hell would we have to blog about it Andrea! Ha!

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  14. very nice blog. informative and interesting. topic is one of my interest.

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  15. sometimes kids needs to be treated democratically. they want to blackmail u but parents must be sharp enough to redirect them in the positive way without losing temperament. is it?

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